I was watching the reality show Tia & Tamera a few days ago (love the 90's), and in this episode, the twins went to therapy to work on their communication skills.
They learned about love languages for the first time. I read about love languages when I was in 9th grade and I remember even then it was pretty revelatory. So just in case you hadn't heard of them yet, I wanted to make sure I shared them with you.
In short, the 5 love languages are quality time, words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, and receiving gifts. The theory is that we give and receive love in different ways, and that we often give love in the way that means the most to us. However - that doesn't mean it is the way the other person feels loved the most.
I love this theory because it hinges on the idea that we put others before ourselves and consider how we make other people feel. Understanding love languages can help you in your dating relationships, friendships, and family relationships - but the theory also applies to building any relationship in your life, even professional.
The best way to maintain solid relationships is to try to learn everything you can about the other person and then do things that make him or her feel valued. And of course, you won't want to go up to people and ask them what their love language is - all you have to do is notice what they do to show people they care about them. If you observe carefully enough, you'll figure it out.
While it's vital to learn about others, you will also gain a lot by learning about yourself. The more you learn about yourself in college, the better you'll understand how you can bring your best self to the world and to your future career. You can learn your love language right now by taking this free assessment. If you're in college you'll want to choose the one for "singles."
My primary love language is words of affirmation. So that's why I write to you. You mean more to me than you know <3